First, what not to say:
When considering how to apologize to someone you hurt, there are definitely some phrases or actions that you should try to avoid. These are all things that may only worsen the issue and lead to more pain for your partner.
Don’t follow your apology with “but”: This only serves to make light of what was done.
Don’t use excuses: Try not to blame what you did on anything or anyone else. As an equal partner in your marriage, take ownership and responsibility for what you have done or not done.
Try not to say you are sorry just for the sake of apologizing: Be sincere and back your words up with actions.
Don’t dismiss your spouse’s feelings: Whether you agree or disagree with how your spouse feels, everyone’s feelings deserve to be seen and heard.
Don’t use statements such as: “I’m sorry you feel that way,” “If I offended you, I’m sorry,” or “I’m sorry you took it that way.” All these statements lack personal responsibility and indirectly point the blame at the other person.
So, now that you are ready to sit down and talk things over with your spouse, here are some simple steps you can follow on how to apologize.
Admit you are wrong: “I was wrong.” This may be the most important step of all! When you are thinking about how to apologize to someone, it is crucial for you to admit that you made a mistake somewhere in the process. You must accept and take ownership of your actions or inactions in order for your apology to be genuine and sincere.
Acknowledge that you hurt them: “I understand that I hurt you when I…” Vocalize that you regret what you did and you value their feelings in this situation. It doesn’t matter if you think you are in the wrong or not. If your spouse was hurt, then their feelings are valid, and they deserve an apology.
· Make a plan to fix or change things: “What can I do to make things better?” It may not always be possible to fix a mistake, but having the intention to resolve things in the future will go a long way. If it is possible to make things right again, do everything you can to see it through. Remember…actions speak louder than words! Come up with an action plan and tell your spouse about it.
· Make a plan to fix or change things: “What can I do to make things better?” It may not always be possible to fix a mistake, but having the intention to resolve things in the future will go a long way. If it is possible to make things right again, do everything you can to see it through. Remember…actions speak louder than words! Come up with an action plan and tell your spouse about it.
here’s no denying that it isn’t always easy to apologize for something we did, especially when it led to hurting someone we love. However, it is important for us to learn how to apologize properly so that our spouses can forgive us and begin to heal and move forward.
If you find yourself on the receiving end of the apology, don’t forget that forgiveness can be immediate, while healing may take time. If you are hoping to move forward in your relationship, forgiveness will ultimately be the first step towards healing.
مقال حلو أوي عن فن الاعتذار وأزاي أقدم لشريك حياتي اعتذار مقبول/ إيه اللى أقوله وأيه اللى مينفعش يتقال. المقال عملي جداااا.
What Does it Mean to Be Your Husband’s Helper?
Keren Kanyago
1. It’s Sprinkling Goodness into His Life
“She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.” (Proverbs 31:12)
During creation, God looked upon all that He had made and declared that it was good. But when He looked at man, something was amiss. Man’s relational status was the only aspect in creation that God deemed as “not good.” Enter you, the suitable helper. It seems that one of your chief roles as a wife is to inject “goodness” into your husband’s life. The Proverbs 31 woman does her husband good and not evil all her days.
“Which good things?” you may ask. This majorly involves meeting your husband’s needs and learning his love language.
2. It’s Encouraging and Listening to Him
Men are often hounded by paralyzing fears that they can only divulge to someone they completely trust. Guess what? That’s you, their wife. Give your husband a listening ear when he needs to get things off his chest. Do not rush him or judge him; empathize with him and let him know that you will always be in his corner. Show him your support and encourage him when his plans go belly up.
3. It’s Helping Him—Literally
Imagine trotting down to the kitchen after a busy day at work, gearing up to fix dinner, only to find that someone already whipped up a delectable meal for you! Don’t we all love a helping hand? Every so often, seek to offload some responsibilities on your husband’s to-do list. You could offer to run some errands, help with some of his projects, or merely give your suggestions. Let him know that he can count on your help.
4. It’s Guiding Him Respectfully
Many men will admit that heeding their wives’ advice has often saved them from making many mistakes. As part of being a suitable helper, God has endowed wives with great intuition. That’s why many wives can smell trouble miles away while their husbands remain unsuspecting. Do not hesitate to offer advice to your husband whenever you sense that he is headed in the wrong direction.
But don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean you should control him or ridicule his ideas. Ensure you share your perspective with him respectfully. Consider Queen Esther who did not approach the king haphazardly, even though she was the queen. She even called upon her people to pray and fast before presenting her request. Douse your advice in respect.
5. It’s Meeting His Sexual Needs
Whether you admit it or not, sexual intimacy is a big deal to your husband. It helps him feel masculine, stokes his ego, reduces stress, lifts his mood, and adds a spring to his step. Relationship experts opine that sex is the number one need among married men. For most wives, however, their need for sexual intimacy largely depends on the emotional connection they feel toward their husbands.
Men tend to have a higher sex drive than the average woman. As a suitable helper, do not gloss over your husband’s sexual needs. If you feel disconnected from him, have a conversation with him and iron out the issues that threaten to snuff out the emotional and sexual health of your marriage.
المقال عملي ومهدف للزوجة بيتكلم عن أزاي تقدر تكون معينة لزوجها: زي أنها تشجعه وتسمعه، نساعده بشكل عملي، تقوده بس بكل احترام وتواضع، وهكذا
