Arlene Pellicane
1. Have a daily connecting ritual. Think of a habit that’s easy to do which will establish a ritual of connecting with your spouse each day. It could be snuggling and talking first thing in the morning or last thing at night. Maybe a shared cup of morning coffee or evening prayer. Every night at bedtime I tickle my husband James’ feet and arms (he likes the touch) and we talk about the day (I like the talk). A daily connecting ritual will keep you from slowly drifting away from your spouse.
2. Have a regular date night and annual getaway. For some, regular means a weekly dinner out without the kids. For others, maybe a monthly date works fine. The point is to continue courting one another. I have friends who had a weekly candlelight dinner at home while their kids watched their weekly movie.
3. Respect your spouse’s parenting style. Men and women parent differently and this is good. If a child wants to be comforted after scraping a knee, he will run to mommy. But if he wants to be thrown in the air for a good time, he knows to go to daddy. Don’t disregard or belittle your spouse’s parenting style. Embrace it because the blending of the two styles is very healthy for your child.
4. Pray together and go to church together every week. Coming to God with your praises and needs will bond you spiritually as a couple. Use Scripture verses to pray out loud for God to bless your marriage and children. Pray for unity in the home and provision of your daily needs. Pray your children would walk in truth. The prayers don’t have to be long to be effective. Hold hands as you sit together in church. As you grow closer to God, you will grow closer to each other.
5. Surround yourself with positive friends who speak well of their spouses. Do your closest friends treasure or trash their spouses? Do they assume the best or worst of their partners? Do they model commitment or complaining? Hang out with people who value and protect their marriages. Make no mistake – your friends’ attitudes will rub off on you, so choose your friends wisely
